Modern toilets have nothing on Pompeii when it comes to graffiti

The excavation of the ancient Roman city of Pompeii, which was buried under an ocean of lava after the eruption of Mount Vesuvius, has revealed beautiful murals, frescoes, temples and other examples of classical architecture. But it has also revealed some X-rated examples of ancient Roman graffiti as well, although this isn’t usually a part of most Pompeii tours. The blog Kashgar collected some of the best ones, and they read like the best (or worst) of the kind you find in modern washrooms, but with Roman names inserted where the modern North American names would otherwise be:

In the gladiator barracks: “Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion”

In a tavern: “Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates”

In a bar/brothel: “Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!”

In a bar: “I screwed the barmaid”

On a street wall: “Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog”

graffiti at pompei

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